SexyBack

19th-century Man: I've invented a magical new medium called "photography"! What shall we use it for?
Julia Margaret Cameron: Babies acting sexy!
All of the 19th Century [heartily]: Agreed!



20th-century Man: I've invented a magical new medium called "sound cinema"! What shall we --
20th-century America: Babies acting sexy!

21st-century Scientist: I've invented a magical new medium called "Youtube"! What--
21st-century Global Village: Do you even have to ask?




My Dentist: Clearly I should hang up pictures of sexy cartoon bananas all over my waiting room. There's nothing people like better to look at when they are just waiting.



Cartoonists: Except for cartoon cats acting sexy. That image arose from our collective unconscious at some point and we've been reproducing it ever since, as if it's something that humans naturally and intuitively relate to.




People across Time: We are such weirdos.

Me [slowly backing out of room]: Agreed.

It's all a blog.

I was just thinking about political blogs and "The Daily Show" and old time political cartoons. That blog would really write itself, though. Just stew on it for a second.
My skills as a playwright of imagined histories -- though I prefer "situation creator" of imagined histories-- have really been growing lately [sound of all readers pretending like they didn't notice] so I thought I'd share with you this latest scene I wrote about hanging out with your friends during yesteryear...if one of your friends during yesteryear was an old time political cartoonist.

Political Cartoonist: Hey guys. I was just thinking: aren't taxation and tariffs almost exactly like two tiny pigs dressed in baby clothes? And what about these industrial monopolies? Could they be more a giant fat person with skinny legs and a top hat and a thousand arms?
Friends: [gales of laughter]
Political Cartoonist: And everything is well labeled!
Friends: [gales of laughter]

laughter dies down

Friend 1: On a more serious note, we have got to do something about this infant mortality rate.
Friend 2: Agreed.
Friend 3: Seriously. At the very least it's just incredibly depressing.