Great News for Barbie Fans

The 3D printer is going to revolutionize daily life and overhaul the relationship between private and commercial spheres. Or at least, provide 24/7 access to Barbie dolls, plastic Gumby figurines, and weird plastic seashells.
The main reason I’m trying to be a professor is so I can say things to the New York Times like “In the future, everyone will have a printer like this at home.” Incidentally, that professor also helped develop the 3D printer.
Here are some lines I’ve got prepared for the next time the Times needs an expert opinion:
“In the future, everyone will be constantly reading novels, studying their history and theory, and doing anything else suspiciously in line with my own professional interests.”
“In the future, everyone will drive flying cars, eat food in the form of pills, live on the moon, destroy themselves by their own military technologies, have headaches from dealing with Cosmo G. Spacely, replace real pets with gigapets, work in a bureaucratic world of cartoonishly menacing machinescapes, speak Esperanto, be fascists, have computer chips built into their brains at birth and be on TV all the time, and own a 3D printer. I’m glad you asked, New York Times.”